Post by Corvus on Apr 5, 2014 21:12:30 GMT -7
PENDING
First off, please allow me to apologize for taking so long to get to this, and welcome to So Long Sentiment! Now that that's out of the way, I have a few issues I would like to address with your bio before I go ahead and put her through.
✘ While it's relatively minor, and I can even hop in and fix it myself if you want, but do you see at the top of the bio where it says "FIRST LAST?" Your character's name is supposed to go there; if you're having trouble finding it in the template, like I said, it's no hassle for me to get it for you.
✘ Next, while we definitely allow you to use your own art for a character, we do like to see proof somehow that it is indeed yours or a character created for you, as mentioned here. You don't have to link anything in the profile, just a message to a mod/admin should suffice.
✘ Now this is a minor nitpick of mine, but you state that she "doesn't afraid of anything" under her positive traits - I try not to nag on grammar too much, but could you fix it, please? Both "Is not afraid of anything" or "Doesn't fear anything" would work, and you seem to be caught between the two here.
✘ I'm pretty dumb when it comes to medical matters, so I have to ask: do allergy attacks in relation to dogs really get that bad? I looked up pet allergies to try and get a better idea of things after reading this, but it seemed like they mostly described itching, breathing problems/coughing, a stuffy/running nose, and skin reactions such as hives. Of course, it's probably ridiculous to preach about realism when there are giant monsters stomping about, so feel free to ask another staff member if you think I'm being unfair or rude questioning this, seriously. '>w>
✘ Probably what confuses me most is her arrest for...assault with magic? But it seemed to me like she only cut that kid with a knife...so why would she be charged for magic - and furthermore, I don't know if you can be charged with assault with magic. ^-^' If you're saying she has actual magic powers that were related to the incident, I think you'll need to have a talk with Ryuu about whether she'll allow it or not.
Once more, if there is any point you would like a second opinion on - not just what I've suggested - feel free to contact another staff member. I apologize again for taking so long to get to look this over, and I hope that I can give you better news next time around. Until then, have a good night!
✘ While it's relatively minor, and I can even hop in and fix it myself if you want, but do you see at the top of the bio where it says "FIRST LAST?" Your character's name is supposed to go there; if you're having trouble finding it in the template, like I said, it's no hassle for me to get it for you.
✘ Next, while we definitely allow you to use your own art for a character, we do like to see proof somehow that it is indeed yours or a character created for you, as mentioned here. You don't have to link anything in the profile, just a message to a mod/admin should suffice.
✘ Now this is a minor nitpick of mine, but you state that she "doesn't afraid of anything" under her positive traits - I try not to nag on grammar too much, but could you fix it, please? Both "Is not afraid of anything" or "Doesn't fear anything" would work, and you seem to be caught between the two here.
✘ I'm pretty dumb when it comes to medical matters, so I have to ask: do allergy attacks in relation to dogs really get that bad? I looked up pet allergies to try and get a better idea of things after reading this, but it seemed like they mostly described itching, breathing problems/coughing, a stuffy/running nose, and skin reactions such as hives. Of course, it's probably ridiculous to preach about realism when there are giant monsters stomping about, so feel free to ask another staff member if you think I'm being unfair or rude questioning this, seriously. '>w>
✘ Probably what confuses me most is her arrest for...assault with magic? But it seemed to me like she only cut that kid with a knife...so why would she be charged for magic - and furthermore, I don't know if you can be charged with assault with magic. ^-^' If you're saying she has actual magic powers that were related to the incident, I think you'll need to have a talk with Ryuu about whether she'll allow it or not.
Once more, if there is any point you would like a second opinion on - not just what I've suggested - feel free to contact another staff member. I apologize again for taking so long to get to look this over, and I hope that I can give you better news next time around. Until then, have a good night!